An inability to stay quiet is one of the conspicuous failings of mankind. ~Walter Bagehot
I don't mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy. ~Samuel Butler, Note-Books, 1912
You know, of course, that the Tasmanians, who never committed adultery, are now extinct. ~W. Somerset Maugham, The Bread-Winner
The good die young - because they see it's no use living if you've got to be good. ~John Barrymore
Baseball is like a poker game. Nobody wants to quit when he's losing; nobody wants you to quit when you're ahead. ~Jackie Robinson
Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first. ~Ernestine Ulmer
The one place where a man ought to get a square deal is in a courtroom, be he any color of the rainbow, but people have a way of carrying their resentments right into a jury box. As you grow older, you'll see white men cheat black men every day of your life, but let me tell you something and don't you forget it - whenever a white man does that to a black man, no matter who he is, how rich he is, or how fine a family he comes from, that white man is trash. ~Harper Lee
A fact is a simple statement that everyone believes. It is innocent, unless found guilty. A hypothesis is a novel suggestion that no one wants to believe. It is guilty, until found effective. ~Edward Teller
It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. ~Attributed to Harry S Truman
Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will dead-end in a Disney parking area large enough to have its own climate, populated by large nomadic families who have been trying to find their cars since the Carter administration. ~Dave Barry
One thing you will probably remember well is any time you forgive and forget. ~Franklin P. Jones
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco. ~Author unknown, commonly misattributed to Mark Twain
If man thinks about his physical or moral state he usually discovers that he is ill. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Men have always detested women's gossip because they suspect the truth: Their measurements are being taken and compared. ~Erica Jong
History is the discipline closest to life; and life is rarely free of contradictions. ~Karl J. Weintraub, Visions of Culture
Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel. ~Gilbert Keith Chesterton, Orthodoxy, 1909
What would constitute useful history? That which should teach us our duties and our rights, without appearing to teach them. ~Voltaire, Philosophical Dictionary
Perhaps only his sense of humor and irony can save him when he hears the most powerful nation in the world speaking of his aggression as it drops thousands of bombs on a poor weak nation more than eight thousand miles away from its shores. ~Martin Luther King, Jr., about Ho Chi Minh, Beyond Vietnam lecture, 4 April 1968
When gravity calls, something falls. ~J.L.W. Brooks
When I bestride him, I soar, I am a hawk: he trots the air; the earth sings when he touches it; the basest horn of his hoof is more musical than the pipe of Hermes. ~William Shakespeare, Henry V
Sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. ~Author Unknown
Canst thou bind, the sweet influences of Pleiades, or loose the bands of Orion? ~Job 38:31
When safety is a factor, call in a contractor. ~Author Unknown
For thousands of years, human beings had screwed up and trashed and crapped on this planet, and now history expected me to clean up after everyone. I have to wash out and flatten my soup cans. And account for every drop of used motor oil. And I have to foot the bill for nuclear waste and buried gasoline tanks and landfilled toxic sludge dumped a generation before I was born. ~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club, Chapter 16