funny quotes on men

Sleep lingers all our lifetime about our eyes, as night hovers all day in the boughs of the fir-tree. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson



We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves. ~Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld



Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever." ~Gene Perret Retreat, hell! We're just advancing in another direction. ~Oliver Prince Smith



Young lovers and young nations face the same problem: after orgasm, what? ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960



The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet



The basic problems facing the world today are not susceptible to a military solution. ~John F. Kennedy



All wars are follies, very expensive and very mischievous ones. In my opinion, there never was a good war or a bad peace. When will mankind be convinced and agree to settle their difficulties by arbitration? ~Benjamin Franklin



Philosophy teaches a man that he can't take it with him; taxes teach him he can't leave it behind either. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966



It's really the cat's house - we just pay the mortgage. ~Author Unknown



A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a quip, and worried to death by a frown on the right man's brow. ~Charlie Brower



I have had more trouble with myself than with any other man I have ever met. ~Dwight Lyman Moody



Anthologies of aphorisms are usually arranged according to themes.... This is not the best method for the aphorism, because it often has several themes and interpretations. ~Markku Envall



It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed. ~Author Unknown



If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam. ~Lord Langdale (Henry Bickersteth)



Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope



If inflation continues to soar, you're going to have to work like a dog just to live like one. ~George Gobel



Many forms of Government have been tried, and will be tried in this world of sin and woe. No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that democracy is the worst form of Government except all those others that have been tried from time to time. ~Winston Churchill



When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him. ~Henry Wheeler Shaw, a.k.a. Josh Billings



Keep doing some kind of work, that the devil may always find you employed. ~St. Jerome



No good neurotic finds it difficult to be both opinionated and indecisive. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960